Happy New Year! I can't begin tell you how glad relieved stinkin' thrilled I am to say goodbye to 2010. It's been a rough one for a whole host of reasons I won't detail here on my blog.
In fact, my blog is a good indicator - when I stop blogging, there's big, bad stuff going on that I can't talk about. So when you look at my blog posts and see I made one on January 12, 2010 and the next one came in September ... well, that says a lot about what kind of year it was.
But that's all behind us now, right? Because we've turned both the proverbial and literal page as the calendar flips over to 2011. And I know in my heart of hearts that this year is going to be an awesome one.
No matter how tempted I am to say, "Because it darn sure can't get much worse than last year," I'm not gonna do it... because I know that's just tempting fate. God has a sense of humor, and he won't give you more than you can handle, but don't pray for patience because he will test yours. I know, 'cause I've seen him do it.
I know 2011 is going to be a better year than 2010 because I've learned so much from the year that's past.
I've learned...
- God is in absolute control of my life. My stress level will be much, much easier to handle if I recognize those things I can affect (like how well I treat my husband) and just give up the illusion I control other things (like, whether I'm going to lose my job). God's driving that particular bus ... Ultimately, it's the Serenity prayer, right? God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
- I'm married to one of the most amazing men on this planet. Yes, he's imperfect ... but with every one of those imperfections, he's perfectly matched for me. I can't imagine any other man would have stood by my side through everything that happened this year. We've weathered one hell of a storm, and come out the other side. I count every day I get with my Jim as the greatest blessing, and he makes me want to be a better woman, a better person, a better wife, a better partner.
- I've got an exceptionally cool stepdaughter. I'm fortunate I was able to forge a relationship with Veronica in her late childhood or 'tween stage, before the teenage thing happened. Because now that she's there, I can see it would have been much, much more challenging. But with the foundation we build when she was 11 and 12, now that she's 14 (choke!) it's evolved into a pretty cool relationship. I've learned that I need to devote one-on-one time to V, separate from her dad, so she can talk to me about girl stuff. Because she does. It's not only cool to be another adult she trusts with the important stuff, it's a big responsibility.
- I need to make time for family. Not the ones I live with day-to-day, although that's important, and Jim and I plan to re-institute date-nights on a monthly basis this year ... I'm talking about my mom & dad, and my brother and sister-in-law and their beautiful daughters. I do a good job of staying in touch by phone, but this year, I need to see them in person more often. Mom & Dad are about 5 hours away by car, and Jim & Heather are about 8 hours away, so it's not like I absolutely have to climb on a plane to see them. This year, I need to make the time to be there in person for my family.
- It's time to see a neurologist. Actually, it's long past time. I've been allowing Internal Medicine docs to treat my migraines for over 20 years, and the best we've been able to do is "mostly" control them. So in early December, I finally saw a neurologist, and he put the pieces together - not only for my migraines, but also for my fibromyalgia - and we begin treatment on January 4th. I haven't talked much about my fibro, but it's time to share a little ... and that's something I'll be doing here on my blog as the treatment begins. If I don't take care of my fixing what's wrong with my body, I won't be able to do anything else well. ANYTHING.
- Finally ... I live with a lot of stress. Much of it comes from my job - the nature of the beast - and the rest of it is just my personality. I take stress on myself, and when stress doesn't exist, I will manufacture it. Yeah, I know, that's sick ... and silly ... but it is what it is. Part of the self-awareness I've gained in my 30's is an understanding (and acceptance) of not just who I am, but how I work. Anyway ... I absolutely must take specific steps to burn off my stress each and every day, or it will eat me alive. I've learned there are two things that work for me - exercise and creativity. So, I have to move my body and my brain in ways that feel like play.
I'm not doing resolutions this year.
Resolutions get broken, and then you feel like a failure. Instead, I've got lessons I learned in 2010, and I'm simply going to apply what I learned in 2011 to make it a better year.
I am, however, participating in a project I've done for several years running: Ali Edwards' One Little Word. It involves choosing a word to be your guide, your focus, for the coming year. In 2008, I used balance. In 2009, I used invest. In 2010, I used health (which sort of backfired on me).
This year, Ali has developed a 12-month class she's offering through Big Picture Classes called, of course, One Little Word. I've signed up to take the class, and I'm ridiculously excited about the structure, about the ideas, about the inspiration she's providing to keep us focused on our chosen word throughout the year.
For 2011, my word is listen.
I'll blog all about it in another post.
To borrow a phrase from Audrey Reed (who is taking the One Little Word class with me!) I am so stinkin' excited to see 2010 in the rearview mirror. I resolve to listen more in 2011, to take the lessons I learned in 2010 and as the bumps and bruises and scrapes begin to heal, to apply what I learned to make this new year a thing of beauty.
Welcome, 2011!
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